I guess so

I read a letter and made a reply. However, before sending my reply, I noticed one line that struck me. "Guess you wouldn't know". She was right, I wouldn't know......



Last night, I was on the point of writing a new entry here but then I managed not to because of some pointless chat I had.

You see, on my way home, I had some things in mind. I was asking for how long will I be keeping myself single. Will I go a-hunting or a-waiting? Then I realized, if I did go searching, who or WHAT will I search for. And if I do wait, how will I know he's the right one?

And I checked my list. And I realized, there are a lot of loopholes.

I always thought I wanted a short guy. Because I didn't want to look up when talking to him. But then wouldn't it be nice when he embraces you he would look down on you and tell you how much he loves you? You would then look up and tell him the same thing and then disappear in his embrace. Well, an inch or two difference would be fine. Still no to tall guys. They scare me. haha

And I thought I wanted a guy who's intelligent. But hey, I once settled for someone who wasn't, well, that, intelligent (no offense if you get to read this!). But then, I get so annoyed if I get if I lose a conversation. And I just don't lose A conversation, I lose in all conversations! I get annoyed when I know he knows better. I am not proven wrong but I am left helpless! What the! I still want an intelligent guy though. I will just try and practice accepting defeat. ngehk. weird :)

And I wanted a guy who's got that scruffy and dirty look. Because I like it tough. haha But lately I realized that a cleaner-than-scruffy-yet-not-so-clean look would be really nice. I mean, my parents would love that. haha

I want a dark guy. Because that means I wouldn't have to be so conscious as to how I would look beside him. But then a fair-toned guy would encourage me to take care of my skin, diba (ngehks, haiden kho, ishdatchoo i'm referring to?)..

Lately I have been thinking that it is time to move on. Char. but I have moved on. But there are times that you feel alone and you want to be in the comfort of somebody else's arms (jatira). And I have been thinking.

Will I be like this for long? Somebody has been asking me what is my type of guy. And then I say I don't know. I have my checklist yet I don't think the items would suit me just right. What if Mr. Right Guy comes along yet he doesn't score a 100% based on my list? I may have made a wrong list or maybe, I just didn't listen to myself well.

I miss the feeling. Rather, right now, I can't even say if I had the felt the feeling of being in love before. I want to know what it's like again. Now na.


so maybe, "Guess you wouldn't know".. because it would be different every time. totally different. for now, I just want to know how it is to be loved again. in a relationship that i can proudly brag about. in a relationship where there is me, and him, and my family and friends. when it's not only us but you as well (dli pud sharing2x..).

When it's US and the rest of you being happy for us.

ambot oi kung nasabtan ba ko, pero mao na akong na think gahapon ug karon.